Pintrest Mariah Fields

UNHINGED E2: My Man

So my mind has been warring with my heart for a minute. This is not gangster of me and so I’ll just let whoever wins have a go at this. Disclaimer, I had no say in whatever the outcome of this contest is and I will be as surprised as you in the end.

Hey, I have been refreshing my messages every single hour hoping you’ve texted. I even muted and blocked all notifications to keep my anxiety under wraps. It felt funny how people would say that notifications from certain people made their days better, surreal I thought, or maybe they just like exaggerating things. Darling, I know better now, you should see me hiding my phone to at least get some work done.

Have they eaten? Is work that busy? Do they need a pick-me-up? Why am I obsessing over learning your favorite meals? I barely even cook for myself so why are you the outlier? So many questions ran through my mind and no amount of distractions get them out unless…

I know I said I am okay with a lot and I am but there are days I just want you for myself. Selfish thoughts I know but I am allowed to be human and even miss you a lot. Truthfully I just might pass out in your embrace knowing you’d catch me before I hit the ground. By now I am sure you are used to my theatrics, a part of me hopes you miss it when I am away.

Silently hoping that your days feel grey when I am not around. I would want you to feel safe enough to be vulnerable around me. Last night was amazing, just you and I sharing our thoughts and ideas. I love what we are building, an environment that is conducive for us.

Don’t forget to bring chocolate muffins tonight, remember it’s our tea time. I need to catch you up with the latest episode of office drama. You see Jackie from Finance, she absolutely did the thing. I am afraid if I say more you’ll get the gist. We’ll probably be up so late but we get to do our favorite bonding activity, sleeping in on Saturday mornings. I know you thought differently, you gutter head!

When I see you smile, I am re-energized. It’s in the tiny ways you love me, ensuring all the dirty linen is in the laundry basket. It’s in the way you make my eggs slightly burnt because I like the crispiness. How you’ll make sure I know what’s going on so I can stay assured you’re okay.

There is a lot of water in my eyes it seems like evolution made it possible for human beings to have personal swimming pools. Dear darling, thank you for proving that good people exist. Thank you for making life feel like bliss. I can’t wait to see you later. Good day my love.

Sincerely and only yours,

Your favorite Lover Girl.

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